Haunted Houses are a "Hell No!"

Since I've had Asher, I've been spending more time with my Mom and Ashley on my days off. We go to the library, out to lunch, to the Gateway, I love having 4 days weekends!

One of my favorite things to do around Halloween is make sugar cookies. All the yummy sugar, Crisco, and butter just make me want to eat them till I get diabetes and then sneak them when the nurses aren't looking.

As my Mom, sister and I are making cookies, my Mom says, "Do you want to go to a Haunted House?" "Really?" My Mom has never expressed interest in anything scary, or haunted housey before so I was a little shocked. When I asked her why, she said that she had seen a review of a bunch on Haunted Houses on KSL and thought that they looked fun. She then went on the explain what some of their spooky features were

At one, if you wear a poncho into the Haunted House, you're saying that you are OK getting man-handled and squirted with stuff like fake blood, ooze, whatever. One is strewn throughout a forest and one is actually in a maze where the maze changes while you're in it. You go down one corridor, turn around and the hallway that you came from, is now a wall. They all sound pretty cool, except for the bodily fluids one. It actually reminds me of a concert one of my friends went to in High School; she said that they hosed the crowd with fake blood. Hhhhmmm, something tells me it wasn't a Hannah Montana concert.

I blatantly and forcefully told my Mom that under no circumstances would I go to a Haunted House. Here's why . . .

When I lived in Reno, my Dad was the Bishop of our ward. He used to have Haunted Houses in this little basement classroom. Now it wasn't anything too gory, but I remember that they had a guy laying on an "operating" table and they had spaghetti and fake blood as his guts all hanging out. Talk about the Spirit! I could definitely feel Heavenly Father's love as the patient screamed, and played with his own entrails.

Ever since then, I am terrified of Haunted Houses.

At Universal Studios we went into a ride for the Mummy movie. A couple turns through the line and a Mummy park employee jumping out at me was enough for me to insist (insist is a nice word, more like berate them) that they get me out of there. I was led through a back hallway, and to a service elevator. Of course when I saw 8 year old girls with pigtails skipping into the ride, I felt like a wiener.

So, while my family is being pummeled with intestines and hosed in blood, I'll be at home eating sugar cookies.